For the last thirty years, almost to the day, I’ve spoken to my best friend on the telephone, almost every day. That’s not hyperbole—we rarely miss an opportunity to chat like teenagers, easily falling into conversations about nothing in particular, with a smattering of real-life issues thrown in. I won’t lie to you; most of our conversations involve obscure movie and television quotes that have been co-opted for applicable point-making. If I tried that with my wife, she’d look at me and wonder if I’d been spending too much time alone. But with my buddy—you’ve heard me refer to him as my brother, which is another article entirely—it’s effortless, understood, and amusing. It’s also effective.

We haven’t lived in the same city for almost twenty years. Before that, it was another three. For twenty-seven years of our thirty-year friendship, we’ve lived in different cities, and for most of the time, different states. All we’ve had is a telephone, with occasional visits, to keep our relationship strong, and to continue to grow together. Not many people have the type of bond that we do, I’m not blind to that. But it has also taken a great effort on both of our parts to remain in contact. Sometimes, I’ll get so busy that he’ll call or text and say, “Don’t forget, you get really sick when you work/go to hard.” Sometimes he’ll get wrapped up in his work and volunteer to do too much on the side and I’ll say, “Hey, don’t forget that you’re not Superman and you need to ease up a bit, take care of yourself.” Both of these statements—while true on the surface—also mean something added: “It’s been a day or two, don’t make me put your face on a milk carton. Call me.”

This practice is not just with him, anymore…this everyday conversation to build relationship. While it’s been all we’ve had over the past two and a half decades, it was out of necessity and desire to remain in contact through separation by proximity. But now, the whole world is operating like we do. I wonder how it’s going? Not everyone enjoys telephone conversations… Most people these days prefer to text in order to move on with their day; the phone has become less of a verbal communication device and more of a ‘let’s get this out real quick so I can avoid a lengthy conversation and get back to my day’ piece of equipment. But phones are all we have—or computers with video. That’s how we can connect these days, in meaningful ways. It isn’t the same as being in person, but take it from someone who has a relationship built on distance through the telephone: it works, and it’s beautiful.

In times like this, many folks are lonely. Even if you live with someone, or three or four other humans, chances are that you’re missing human connection with people. We all love our families, but we also love our friends, our people. So how can we do that in a time that sees us isolated? A phone call.

There’s still work to be done. Not everyone is simply sitting at home waiting for this to end. But, let’s face it, some people are. And then there are those that do work full-time still, but also have the energy and desire to do a little extra at night. So here’s what I’m proposing: If you’re one that wants to keep up connection, wants to check on folks, and/or one that is feeling a bit isolated and could use some conversation, I think we should divvy up the phone list and begin checking on one another. We have quite a few folks living alone in our midst. We have quite a few people with anxiety about the future. We have friends who might need to vent, cry, laugh, or tell a silly story from their day, whom have no other avenue through which to do so. If you’re interested in being one of the ‘callers’, send me an email at fathersean@resurrectionokc.org. I’m going to put a list together in the next day or two for individuals to reach out and utilize. I’m thinking if ten people made ten calls a week (or less, if that’s too much) that we’d cover everyone in the church in ten days or so. Think about that. Families contacting families for a few minutes, or longer if desired, just to see how they’re doing. It sounds like church, to me. And in reality, it sounds like the deepening of relationship that I’ve been doing for over thirty years with someone who has become so deep a part of me that words can’t give it a fair explanation.

So let me know if you’d like to join in on the phun (heheh) and I’ll get us going. On the same note, please let me know via email if you don’t want your number given out to anyone. That’s not strange and I completely understand. Not everyone needs this, but I’m willing to bet that most, do. If I don’t hear from you, I’ll assume you’re alright with being contacted and that will be that.

We need each other, right now, and always. Part of being a church community is just that—being community with one another. As time rolls by and we discover new ways in which to worship, we also have to come up with new ways in which to remain in community. The Zoom calls on Wednesday evenings and the phone calls/texts I make during the day are good, but imagine if there were ten or twenty people doing it, too!

I hope you’re well, and I hope that you’re taking care of yourselves. As always, if you need anything please don’t hesitate to ask, I’m just a phone-call away…

Faithfully,

Fr. Sean+